Okay. So it?s a tragedy that this teenage girl in Kansas got inside the tiger?s cage last week and was easily slaughtered inside its feline jaws. But cold-hearted question number one: Why didn?t anyone inform her that tigers and nature?s other megafauna weren?t made for cages or, in general, for humans to play with? Question number two: Since said tragedy occured in the enlightened state of Kansas, will we have to give her both a Darwin Award AND an Intelligent Design Award? Heartless question number three: If there is, in fact, no such natural principle as so-called evolution, will the filtering out of her genes in any way affect the collective intelligence of our species?
And in international news? Newsweek magazine outdid itself last week, and wrote a fairly even-handed, in-depth article about the pull-out of Jewish settlers from Gaza. It touched thoughtfully upon all the key elements of this historical moment: the woes of the settlers, the terribly young Jewish soldiers weeping as they led out the farmers who had planted their hopes in the soil, and the pathos of the Palestinians, their hopes, their suffering. There was even an interview with an orthodox settler who showed the Newsweek correspondant a potato he had dug out of the ground with his own hands. And he told the reporter to look closely at the earthy potato, with its lumps and eyes?wasn?t that obviously the face of Moses? Okay. So, forget that for a thousand years people have been seeing the Virgin Mary in their pasta fazul and that kind of thing, and now one Jewish guy in the middle of the summer in the southern desert under a lot of stress says something crazy, forget all that. My question is this: Didn?t the other settlers know that Newsweek would be coming? ?Avi, Avi, whatever you do, don?t tell the American press your potato story. The Jewish and Arab newspapers, they know you?re just the potato guy, but, please, Avi, please, it?s Newsweek, goyishe-kop, you know they?ll just eat it up.?
My other question: Is Thomas Friedman a piece of shit or what?
